Over many years, and after experiences both good and bad, I have developed what I call The 25 Religious Rules of Life. And they are just that — rules about religion. Twenty-five of them. I suppose there could be more, but there are 10 commandments, 12 disciples, and 24 elders in heaven, so I wanted a different number, and 25 seemed like a good place to stop.

It was back in 1986 when I first jotted a few of these down in a very cheap, yellow-covered notebook. A university professor I admired was the catalyst that eventually caused “The 25” to be born. For many years I walked around with 10 written religious rules, until certain life events in the beginning of the new century, inspired the creation of 15 additional religious rules.

Like most (if not all) of my English, Scottish, and French (Huguenot) ancestors, I was brought up as a Protestant. And as a very conservative Baptist. Basically, I think it could be said, I haven’t strayed too far from that — well, here and there I have. Actually, to be honest, I find myself in an awkward position: Too conservative to be liberal and too liberal to be conservative.

Some of these rules were inspired by certain individuals, while other rules were inspired by certain educational institutions, religious movements or a predominant attitude. In the list that follows here, “The 25” are in no particular order…

The 25 Religious Rules of Life

“Keepist thou thine own head when all around, others are losing theirs.” ~ Easton 1:2

1. A preacher or minister will tell you what his greatest sin, weakness, or obsession is – it will be the subject he preaches on most often.

2. Be extremely wary of so-called “ministries” that make their entire focus one small area of the Bible.

3. Creation is not science and science is not Creation.

4. The Bible is not and was never meant to be a science textbook.

5. The Bible is a book – not an idol.

6. Not everything in the Bible is to be taken literally.

7. Being wealthy is not a sign of God’s approval.

8. There is seldom a direct connection between “sin” and life’s catastrophes.

9. Eve was the first Independent Fundamental Baptist – she added to God’s original command.

10. Miracles usually aren’t. Miracles are infrequent and statistically impossible. That’s why they’re miracles.

11. Never ever enter a church “unguarded” – look, listen and question everything – especially the pastor.

12. Preaching “style” is inversely proportional to sermon content – and relevance.

13. Religion is a dish best served hot.

14. Religious devotion is one of the easiest things to fake.

15. Hell is where God isn’t.

16. The sum of religious fervor is inversely proportional to the intelligence of the individual who demonstrates it.

17. The only difference between the imaginary and the invisible is your belief.

18. Devilry exists, whether the Devil does or not.

19. Prolonged guilt is the result of the mistaken notion that others live a better life than you do.

20. Morality is overrated.

21. Having a “Jesus Fish” or a Bible Verse on your car does not make you more spiritual than we normal people who do not.

22. Taking God’s Name in vain does not always involve cursing.

23. Christian education is a convenience, not a requirement.

24. It is an undeniable fact that, over time, Biblical text has been both inadvertently and intentionally altered and amended.

25. A pastor, minister, bishop or priest who religiously updates his personal blog is spending too much time on the computer – check his hard drive.